Oneida and Caleb have been such big blessings in my life! They are the directors for the University of Arizona Chi Alpha and they are always ready and willing to serve. Their love story is one I love to hear over and over again. Check out what Oneida has to say today. I love her words of wisdom and quirky perspective!
Wedding Date: March 7, 2010
Favorite Thing about being married: Where do I start? I love being married. But my most favorite thing is learning more what marriage means every day. At the beginning, I would get frustrated about stuff – like if we didn’t see eye to eye or couldn’t figure out things in our relationship. I would see it as something impossible to overcome or a mark that something was wrong with us. Caleb would always point us to God and say ‘one day at a time’. Over time, I’ve learned that instead of seeing these challenges as negative, I see them as something positive and incredible. That I get to learn how to be married for the rest of my life and that the commitment we made means that I get to learn and grow in love and respect for him for the rest of my life. I really love that marriage has made me a more humble, respectful, honest, loving, understanding person. And I only will become more of that as time goes on, because trust me, there is a lot more!
Most Unique Thing about Your Wedding: I don’t think our wedding was very unique, but we certainly felt like everyone was there to have a good time, that they really came to see us get married and didn’t care about what everything looked like or any of those other things that seem so important about a wedding but in the end, are not. We know this because we had an outdoor wedding and it rained. Hard. Like ice cold, pouring down, windy rain. One of my favorite wedding memories is, right before I stepped out of the door to walk down the aisle, the owner of the house where we got married held out my umbrella and whispered to me, “You have the best guests we’ve ever had.” Later I learned that they asked the crowd if they would rather wait for the rain to subdue or start the wedding and they gave up a big cheer and said “Let’s do it!!!” The owner and his family kept thanking us for being so accommodating about the rain and saying that our guests were the most kind and fun people. I couldn’t have been more proud of our family and our community.
Something You Learned about Your Spouse Post Wedding: Caleb is a reserved person, so it has been great seeing sides to him that no one (or very few people) get to see. I learned that there is so much more to him than what he shows to others and that not everyone desires to show off who they are or what they do to the world. He loves to do things for people and doesn’t care if they know that it is him or not. For example, once he secretly fixed our friend’s car window. He bought the part and snuck over to his house with his tools and fixed it while he was at class or work or something. I got super excited too, and I asked Caleb, ‘What did he say???” And Caleb replied that he hadn’t even told him that he did it. He just wanted him to be surprised. I think eventually the guy found out it was Caleb but I just loved that Caleb didn’t even think of telling him. He loves serving people and doesn’t expect any credit for it.
Favorite Place for Date Night: We are working harder on going out on dates. I got pregnant after 2 months of marriage and we had 2 kids right in a row, and we weren’t very diligent about making time for ourselves. Also, we work a lot of nights, so we end up doing more date lunches/days. My favorite date so far has been going to the thrift store and buying random things or challenging each other to buy clothes that are more outside of the box for us. I like doing things that don’t include just sitting and eating because Caleb is more of an introverted person and not a conversationalist, so doing more active things helps.
Biggest Word of Marriage Advice: Your marriage is more important than what you want and it’s more important than being right. It is a commitment and a covenant that you made that is bigger than yourself. It is an opportunity to be a part of something bigger and more complicated and more beautiful and stronger than you could ever be and you have to treat it that way.